Gratitude is not an event; it is a way of life. Like love, it should not be turned on or off, depending on the circumstances, but ought to flow freely from a full heart. These words are easy to say, and take a lifetime to implement. However, like gardening, though it takes many years to learn all the techniques to a successful harvest, you can still enjoy the fruits of your labor, imperfect though it may be. So with gratitude, there are ways in which we can increase our yield and perhaps find greater happiness along the way, unfinished though our lives may be.
When my husband and I were first married, we discovered that there were months, especially while finishing college, when the paycheck did not quite fit the expenses. There seemed to be nothing for it except maybe to quit school, get another job, or move in with parents. None of the options seemed like the right thing to do, so we wondered, worried and prayed. The result? Nothing changed. We were still strapped. Then an idea occurred to me. I took out a piece of paper and began writing down all the things I had. I listed everything, including pencil and paper! After spending something like an hour writing down all the things we had and were thankful for, I realized that there was nothing to worry about. We had all we needed and the rest was insignificant by comparison. Our good parents, brothers and sisters, our children, home, life, furniture, food, shelter, church, friends, clothing, teachers, school and practically numberless other good things were overwhelmingly shouting at me to be thankful. Once I was thankful for all of that, the worry over money seemed small and petty.
The trouble with ingratitude is that it sees only the thing it lacks. It does not see any of the good things surrounding it. Ingratitude can look outside and be angry that the wind is blowing while completely ignoring the fact that the sun is shining and providing life to a whole world of beauty. The amazing thing about gratitude is that it sees only what is good and is thankful for it. It reminds me of a trip I went on with my family when I was young. We were traveling through the mountains and because of the size of our family we were in two station wagons. One of them had trouble with the slow climb up the mountain pass and every couple of miles we all had to stop while the car cooled off. Then we would go another couple of miles and stop again. This routine began to become tedious and some of the children complained that it was taking too long. Mother wisely counseled us to be thankful for the beautiful scenery and just enjoy the ride. Toward the summit of that mountain pass, I watched two motorcycles speed past us while we turned off the road for yet another rest stop. How I wished I could have gone with those motorcyclists and not have been sitting there with that old station wagon. We waited while the car cooled off, then set out again on our crawling little journey up the mountain. As we rounded the corner just a mile or so from the last turnout, all the traffic had come to a halt. “Another delay.” I thought. “Why does this have to happen?” We sat on the road for a few minutes when the curious teenagers in our vehicles decided to walk ahead to see if they could find out why we had stopped. When they came back, they were very serious and disturbed. They told us that a tree had fallen over the road, killing the two cyclists who had passed us just as we had turned off the road. The realization settled upon all of us that had we not stopped that last time the tree would likely have fallen upon our vehicle.
From that day I began to practice gratitude more than I ever did before, especially in difficult or trying circumstances. Being thankful in impossible situations has allowed me a measure of happiness where normally there would have been none. I discovered that where there are a thousand reasons to be upset or angry and there might be only one small reason to be thankful, it is always to my advantage to choose the gratitude. I reap happiness as a result and the difficult circumstances eventually pass, as they always do. But, I believe that the best reward for gratitude is in becoming a thankful person. Bitterness, anger, resentment, worry, fear, anxiety, stress (and their attendant physical maladies) gradually become a thing of the past. Gratitude is the amazing, free, miracle-working anti-serum. So, take your shot today. It can't hurt.
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